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Wednesday, January 13, 2010

293

Hey. I did say that I'm going to explain the sudden outburst on Facebook yesterday night. I wanted to, really wanted to but I realise that whatever I'm going to post yesterday night would be solely base on anger, disappointment and a whole lot of pissed off emotion. My thinking would be clouded and the post wouldn't be that wise.

So, I decided to take one day to think about it. After much thought, I'm still upset though. No longer pissed or angry. I just felt upset cause it's just fucked up. I really thought she was different. Well, in my mind, I see her as a deep and close friend. Someone who I could built a relationship with. Someone who gave a soggy ass shit about me. I was totally wrong. She is just like the others. Not "Shallow Fucks". But a simple regular girl. Searching for Mr. Right. I can't accept her for her decisions but who am I to say anything about it.

I did text her while I was in driving course. Every day, every night. Whenever she replied, I always smiled. But then, trouble came. I injured my knee. I was going through a tough time. Hence, I stop messaging her. Trying my best to not letting her know what was actually happening to me. Cause I know that she also have her problems to face. I tried my best to recover. Aced all my theory tests in one try. But then, I was pulled out of course.

Well, what more can I say? They are together now. Who am I to judge her? Who am I to say that she's "shallow"? Well, she was so special to me once but I fucked up. She was wonderful. She was hot. Maybe she is still. But, I really wish that things would turn out a different way. But things have happened and I can't do anything now.

Like I said, being "the nice guy" sucks. But someone have to be one right? But for how long? I don't know.

I'm sorry for calling you "shallow" I guess. It was unappropriate and I was truly pissed at that point. It's okay if you decide not to accept my apology. I understand. I'll stay away for good now. Goodbye and have a great life ahead. I will always remember the good times we had. Thanks and appreciate it. :)

Meh............

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