Sunspots

What the fuck is happening...

Okay. What the fuck am I doing? Fuck! I hate myself for being that way. I suddenly changed. Damn! I hate it. I take the blame for what had happened. I can barely face you now. I gonna be in deep shit if I don't stop doing what I'm doing now.

We are like slowly floating away from each other. Either that or I am swimming away from you. I don't actually know why but I feel like I'm screwing up everything when I'm around you. Everything was great before I told you the news. But what else can I do? Whats done is done. I cant undo it. All I can so is look forward and don't look back.

But its hard you see. I tend to be so jealous. Haha. Yeah. And I don't even know why the fuck. I have no right to be jealous and stuff. I am aware that I am being toooo clingy and you may be sick of it and rimas. Haha. I tend to go overboard about this. Haha. I'm just too excited to get a friend that is a girl that is so close to me I guess. Scared of losing her. Haha. Yeah. *wink*

Today I felt like evaporated shit today. Well, all I can so si suck it up, and take it like a man. Maynard said it best when he said, "Life will pound away where the light don't shine, son." Yeah. It will hurt but its just a pain that will pass away.

All I'm worried about is me invading your privacy, making you feel rimas and stuff. All I did was all in good intent. Just that I tend to overdo it. Fear of losing someone that is dear to me is hard to cope with.

I really apologise for not hanging around with you guys. It's just that Fadzli needs to think of what to do. I just don't want to bring the whole group down with me. Seriously, I have no intention to avoid you guys. You guys are my life in ITE. I really just don't want to spoil the mood for everyone.

For now, I will try to stay away from you, okay? Not to avoid you but to give you space. I realise that I have been "in your space" lately and I will try not to invade. But whenever you need someone to talk to, I will still be here. I still trust you and I hope that you still trust me.

- If life sucks, Then suck it up. If life fucks? Then fuck it up.-

Peace